Matter of Taste
by A. Isabel
Summary: His wild eyes stared warningly into the single open hole in the dark mask below and beside him. The shadowy form seemed to shrink under Deidara’s gaze.' DeiTobi Oneshot. M just to be safe.


"Senpei… Scoot over."

"You're jokin', yeah?"

"…No?"

Deidara scoffed and closed his eyes gently; he had no intention of surrendering his space (even though anyone could see it was double what he needed). In a matter of seconds the cycle continued in its seemingly endless loop. How long had they been doing this and when would it end?

"Senpei, scoot over."

"Alright, shut up." At this point the irritated, fair-haired man had turned and was leaning his weight against his propped elbow. His wild eyes stared warningly into the single open hole in the dark mask below and beside him. The shadowy form seemed to shrink under Deidara's gaze.

"…"

Tobi also turned. Anything to escape that glare, those eyes. Tobi looked blankly at the wall; being so close to it there was hardly anything else he could see. Deidara took some satisfaction in this turn of events (expressing it with a smug grin) and allowed his elbow to fall, his head landed lightly onto one of the few pillows.

"You know what? It's a shame… Now I've got all this room, yeah… Too bad Sasori isn't here." Tobi said nothing to this.

His swelling feeling of conquest deflating at a rapid pace, Deidara sighed. The whole fun of it was getting a rise out of him and to have him buckle so soon was a total killjoy. Almost grudgingly, he rolled over and allowed Tobi the space that was rightfully his. Deidara pushed his hair out of his vision (only to have it fall back over his face) and made damn sure that he wasn't facing his partner.

"You ruined it." He ejected bitterly.

"Huh?"

Tobi turned clumsily and questioned the back of Deidara's head; his eye traced the soft curves and sections of his senpei's blond hair.

"Ruined what?

"…The tension. It was nice and you ruined it, yeah."

Tobi was beside himself with uncertainty. Sometimes Deidara could be so… mysterious.

"What tension?"

"Drop it. I don't wanna' deal with explaining it to you."

Tobi sat on these last words for a moment. It was true, Deidara often had to take time out of his day to explain -or try to explain- things of certain natures to the perpetually innocent Tobi. Most of the time these lengthy lectures ended with the masked ninja more bewildered then before yet he couldn't stop himself from blurting inane questions at his mentor whenever something puzzled him. Besides that, Deidara always had some kind of answer for him. He seemed to like flaunting his superior knowledge of the world and the way it worked. Actually, he seemed to like to flaunt in general.

Taking a deep, empowering breath, Tobi addressed his senpai again.

"…Then… I guess you won't wanna' explain what I heard Kisame-San talking about the other day… He called you something and I didn't get it…" Tobi was mumbling practically inaudibly but out of what he could hear, Deidara grasped the gist.

"What did he say?" He replied shortly, his curiosity peaking.

The sound of rustling fabric was enough to tell that Tobi was retreating and sure enough when Deidara turned around, the kid was once again against the wall.

Immediately after hearing his senpei's tone, Tobi began to regret opening his mouth at all.

"What. Did. He. Say." Deidara's words were clipped and contained a threatening, heated quality.

The younger of the two shifted uncomfortably under the elders gaze but finally began to mutter a response. Deidara leaned closer to Tobi so he could make his words out better. His loose hair brushed gently over Tobi's neck and shoulder.

"Hecalled'jooa…'submissivepedophilewhodoesntmindafewsplintersintheass'."

There was a long, thoughtful pause which Deidara utilized to sort out what Tobi had said and let the intensity of the words fully sink in.

"…Damn…That's colorful…" Deidara scratched his neck and pondered the insult, falling once again onto the pillow below him. A submissive pedophile who doesn't mind a few splinters in the ass. It hadn't yet occurred to him that it was so uncharacteristic of Tobi to even remember what had been said but it must have troubled him greatly to stay in his memory for so long.

Deidara stared out into the darkness, in his mind he could see the towering Kisame blathering on about nothing in particular to his uninterested associate. Worst of all he could vividly picture the look of accomplishment on his cobalt face when he discovered he had struck gold with his insult. Kisame must have known that Tobi was there and that the message would be delivered to Deidara in due time. Ha ha ha. Very fucking funny.

"So… What does it mean?" Tobi had grown weary of the stiff silence and his mind, as always, hungered for comprehension. When he received no answer the masked teenager began to tug persistently on the tight black shirt which covered Deidara's chest and stopped above his smooth stomach. He had an overwhelming urge to run his fingers across the pale, soft skin but managed to overpower his animal instincts.

"You wouldn't understand even if I did explain, yeah. But it doesn't really matter because Kisame is just a belligerent animal with a perverted infatuation with his remarkably disturbing rapier. So I guess it's just a matter of taste." Replied Deidara matter-of-factly, his shoulders shrugging indifferently. He was well aware that Tobi would be completely lost but paid no mind and shut his eyes.

"I'm gonna' need to look up a few of those words but… I think you got him back." Tobi wore a look of unparalleled pride upon his face, under his mask he was glowing.

"Pft. Like I said, it doesn't matter. Who gives a damn what an uneducated fuck like-", Deidara found himself unable to complete his thought, what with Tobi's lips pressing fervently against his. It was on this night that Deidara discovered Tobi's uncanny ability to rid himself of his mask at alarming speeds. Deciding it would be pointless to attempt to oppose the sudden (but not all together unwanted) contact, the artist weaved his fingers into Tobi's mass of black hair.

Did Deidara think that Tobi would tell Kisame his response? Honestly it wasn't weighing very heavily on his mind, if he did he did. At the back of his mind a tolerant voice reminded him that Tobi would rather clean the entire living complex in a skanky French maid outfit then double cross his senpei. That was just the kind of blindly loyal, follower he was and Deidara wasn't complaining. It was nice to know that with so much inconsistency around him there was at least on thing he could count on to be the same, as long as there was that, he would play along.


End file.
